I consider buying a small cactus for £7.
Yes, I could be kicked out of Bristol for saying this but
until today I had never shopped at the Holy Grail that is ‘Urban’. I hadn’t realised it was a thing until Uni, when it quickly became
clear that it was the Go-To for anything mesh, faux-vintage or
sporty-when-you-don’t-really-do-sport.
Entering Urban Outfitters is like breaking into the wardrobe
of any student. There are so many different types of fashion here, from floral
chiffon to chunky FILA sweatshirts. I think anyone could see themselves buying
something (if you are willing to miss meals to be able to afford it).
The main test in Urban is you cannot question the relevance of any of these things |
The photo-booth and tables of journals and neon signs and
light-embellished curtain really shouldn’t work here but actually really do. I
don’t know what they add to the experience of trying on ‘reworked’ adidas, but,
there you go.
Just some light reading |
Seeing as it is Valentines day soon, there is a stall
dedicated to the theme. I sidle up expecting some cute clothes decorated with
hearts. Instead, I see completely transparent t-shirts, shorts and bras, topped
off with a sex-position book. I guess if you wear some classic Reeboks, it’s acceptable to pull out Position of the Day Playbook on the
Number 16 for some light reading. I casually scuffle away from the
stalls trying to look unfazed.
Neither Vegan or Norwegian, but I want these books |
Vegan positions and hygge aside, I am actually surprised by
how much I love the clothes. From nights out to chucking something on for a
lecture, I am already creating outfits in my head. I rock up to the cloak-room
with 14 items and come face to face with one cushion that demands I have GOOD
VIBES and a cat pillow, clearly judging how keen I am.
Everyone knows that cat is cooler than I am |
For a few seconds, I
consider shoving all the bright mustard throws and marble-pattern sheets into a
bag, dragging them back to Stokey-B and completely redecorating my room. Then
realise I would probably have to sell my soul to do so and instead throw
another nearby t-shirt onto my pile.
In most other shops this would not be ok, but Pink Polar Bear Chic works here. |
The guy in the changing room helps me with my items. I am
about to excitedly tell him it is my first time in Urban Outfitters, but I
clock his edgily vintage bright-pink sweater and edgily edgy facial hear and
decide not to engage in conversation. The changing rooms are wooden and the
doors have drawn on key-holes because why go for a curtain when you can have
that? I have to say I’m pleased there are doors not curtains so no one can peek
round the edges and see how keenly I’m trying everything on and posing in the
mirror for far longer than is acceptable.
I feel like my bedroom would be improved with every single one of these cacti pots. |
I try on a good range of things, from crop-tops to denim
skirts, to sweaters to plaid shirts, but most of them have a grungy, effortless
vibe (or so I think as I put effort into posing grungily and effortlessly in
the mirror). I particularly like the Calvin Klein crop-top. I’ve never been
into an actual Calvin Klein store because I think they’d kick me out for not
having a six-pack, but it doesn’t seem so daunting when it’s on a rack next to books
that read You Are So Awesome or The Avocado Cookbook. So I try on a grey
crop-top with a plaid shirt. It’s an ensemble I wouldn’t normally think of but
I think inspiration came to me somewhere between the vintage record-player and
the cactus-shaped candles.
The hair-shooshy thing is completely unposed |
I’m enjoying glaring at myself moodily and shrugging on
clothes that all look good together. Then I look at the price tags… It’s hard to look effortless
in an outfit that would eat up a large percentage of my student loan. Once the prices are taken into account, I realise the
Calvin-Klein crop top is just a stretched bit of grey fabric with the name of a
74 year old man printed on my rib cage. I also notice the plaid shirt could
easily have just fallen off the hanger in my Dad’s cupboard. Yes, the Adidas
dress is also just a bit of fabric with a logo but I have to come away from my
first Urban Outfitters trip with at least one prize, ok?
Sad to admit this is potentially the most edgy thing I've ever owned... |
In its rightful place at the front of the 16 Bus. |
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