Fish have whole other respiratory organs to do what we are doing with a plastic tube
The trip didn't start too well. Our flight from Melbourne was at 7, so, of course I woke up at 3am panicking we wouldn't make it. Leaving Camilla sleeping, I ordered an extortionately priced Uber to the airport at 4am. My Uber driver was actually from Cairns and we had a great chat about his home town. But then he asked "so when's your flight? 5.30?" But nope, Mr
Uberman, you have clearly underestimated my travel anxiety. Yep, I decided to leave 3 hours wiggle room for a domestic flight.
Anyway after meeting up with Camilla when she arrived at the airport at 5.30 like a normal person, we were off.
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| Embracing our first rays of sun after escaping the rain in Melbourne |
We stayed at Gilligan's, which is known as the party hostel. Never having stayed in a hostel (always been more of an overpacked-suitcaser than a backpacker), I had very low expectations. I was picturing rodents and bugs everywhere, with pick pockets hiding under your bed and people having sex behind every corner.
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| Home Sweet Home |
I was pleasantly surprised. Although Gilligan's is above an incredibly trashy club (think Blurred Lines playing during a wet t-shirt competition, a casino attached to the main room, and a Bingo Lingo so sexist it puts England's to shame), it was actually pretty clean and had a really friendly atmosphere.
We also used Gilligan's travel agency to help plan and book our day trips. For our first day we went to the Great Barrier Reef with Passions of Paradise (not as telenovela as it sounds). The journey there was very choppy, with Camilla and I clinging desperately to our benches. Greta spent the journey bouncing around saying she could spend a year on that boat, to which I said I'd pass, thanks v much.
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| Shout out to Greta embracing Moana vibes, whilst I tried not to vom. |
When we finally got to the reef it was stunning. We stopped at two spots to get in and snorkel. I've snorkelled once before in Israel where I got so distracted by the fish that I put the whole snorkel underwater, breathed in and got a mouth full of sea water. In my defence, snorkelling is a super weird experience!! Your whole life you swim holding your breath and being aware that you'll have to resurface soonish to get air. Then suddenly boom, you're told 'forget all that- it's all good, breathe
normally in the middle of the ocean surrounded by fish that actually have whole other respiratory organs to do what we are doing with a plastic tube.'
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| Looks like I'm posing but this is genuinely me trying not to get face whipped by my hair in the wind |
Luckily, I chilled out after a bit and got the hang of it and managed to get a great view of one of the 7 natural wonders of the world. The water was amazingly clear and was a perfect temperature the day we went. The coral was maybe a bit of a duller colour than you'd see in pictures but the fish were actually much brighter than I'd expected. We also spotted a few turtles, reef sharks and sting rays, but I must say I did a hasty doggy paddle away whenever the bigger fish got a smidge too close.
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| Let's just ignore that I'm wearing a float belt... |
(Also shout out to the Passions crew who unexpectedly stopped twice on the way back. First to rescue a small boat that had run out of fuel and then to pick up a huge piece of plastic floating in the water. Not all heroes wear capes, folks.)
The next day trip was to rainforests and waterfalls around Cairns. The tour was run by Uncle Brians and our guide was Sid. We were in a group of about 12 people, all traveling in our 20s which was a really nice crew.
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| This lake has a crocodile in it who supposedly doesn't eat humans but I decided to not take that plunge... |
Sid showed us around, simultaneously being entertaining and terrifying, showing us all the many things that can kill you in Queensland, like the Wait-a-while tree, so named because of its tiny spikes hooking into your skin meaning you'll have to wait a while to get out.
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| Thanks for capturing this attempt at a dive that turned into a face plant |
Sid was also helpfully around to snap photos of me falling, slipping and generally embarrassing myself at various moments int he trip, thanks for that.
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| This helpful Nemo preserves a smidge of my dignity whilst showing this stunning facial expression |
One of the highlights was definitely Josephine Falls which has such smooth rocks on the waterfall that you can slide right down it. Despite both Greta and I bruising our bums in the process, it was still amazing.
Tips for anyone considering doing this trip--- bring extra clothes and good towel!!! The water was pretty damn cold in some places and, spoiler alert, a $9 piece of fabric disguised as a towel will be completely useless.
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| "Quick, it's Golden Hour!!" |
After the aforementioned bruises and doggy paddling, we were pretty exhausted on day 3 and took a well deserved break for sunbathing. (Yet another spoiler alert for readers back home, drumroll please... I failed at tanning. I have potentially become paler.)
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| Amazing food (and aesthetic, obvs) at Lafew Cafe & Kombucha Bar |
Our last night out was at Woolshed. Sorry Gilligan's, we love you, but Woolies is the better club. But of course, all nights could always be improved by a lil bit of sexist bingo.
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| Free drinks from Gilligan's... alas, not enough to make us enter the wet t-shirt contest |
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